QUESTION: I have just begun to take care
of my three-year-old grandson one day a week while his mother works.
I feel rather awkward with him because he is always asking questions.
I am not used to having a conversation with a young child. What is
the reason for this kind of constant talking and questioning? It would
help me to understand more about what the normal activities are for
his age.
ANSWER: Words are tools for abstract
thinking. In fact, answering those "why", "what," and "how come" questions
so popular with three-year-olds really matters! Words are symbolic
representations of ideas and concepts. We use words to think. The
more a child has practice linking explanations to events, or following
the concepts presented in a story you read, the greater the opportunity
he has to develop a vocabulary that can be used for independent thinking
and abstract reasoning. Even talking to an unborn child in the last
month of pregnancy has been linked to improved language abilities
and even higher IQ later! It is no different with your three-year-old
grandchild.
Making the effort to talk to your grandchild pays
off in his ability to develop higher reasoning skills. When you take
the time to explain why things work the way they do (whether it is
why a plant needs water, or why a toy cannot be bought immediately
because the store is closed) you give him practice in understanding
the relationship between words and events. Talking about what the
family's plans are for the next day encourages him to visualize the
future.
Let's take a brief look at some of the things your
three-year-old grandson is likely to be capable of, at this point,
and how these abilities interact in his development. You might notice
that he can whisper, walk on tiptoes, feed himself, even use the toilet.
Mastery of physical processes brings confidence, independence, and
a readiness to interact socially. If encouraged, your grandson can
become active in the decisions, activities, and conversations around
him. And his social abilities reinforce his intellectual abilities.
Increased social skills can encourage further opportunities for learning
and curiosity in the world and how it works.
Children of this age also recognize and use humor.
So jokes could be one avenue of fun for both of you! He can probably
also perform simple tasks based on verbal directions, such as picking
up toys and putting them in a basket. Check this website for activities,
jokes, and riddles you and your grandchild can enjoy together.
Cooperation, laughter, and an ability to follow simple
directions can make this age delightful! See what you can find to
do and talk about together. Rest assured that repeating answers and
explanations really does have a purpose. And remember, not only are
you helping him develop, but there will come a day when he may not
be as interested in talking to grandma. So enjoy it while you can.
It will not last!
