Anxiety as well as excitement about the
unknown is common, especially for first-time mothers. Though we all
know that millions upon billions of women have given birth before,
we do not know what it will be like for each of us. The experience
of birth is universal yet it remains a mystery. Like love, labor is
difficult to describe in words. Still, it is the work of each pregnant
woman to seek a personal understanding of and commitment to the process
of childbirth.
To meet the stronger contractions of active labor,
we must develop our own coping styles that are naturally activated
to cope through the pain, rather than merely relax!
Discovering Your Natural Coping Style
We process information based upon the three sensory
cortices of the brain: auditory, visual, and kinesthetic. From the
time of birth, people develop unique patterns for processing and organizing
information. John Grinder and Richard Bandler in their two volumes
of The Structure of Magic, have analyzed patterns by which people
process experience. They describe these models as "representational
systems" and believe that a person will lead with one and favor one
or possibly two cortices for incorporating new information.
Some people process information using the internal
or secondary visual cortex which is used in dreaming and visualization.
Others will rely on the secondary auditory cortex to repeat phrases
in order to comprehend the meaning of a concept. People who utilize
their secondary auditory cortex in this way will be likely to use
auditory metaphors like "It rings true." And still others will need
a hunch or to "feel it in the gut" in order to understand. These people
utilize the internal kinesthetic cortex for their primary system in
processing new information.
It is also possible, even desirable, to develop all
three cortices for information processing, which will yield greater
creativity and lend a richness to our everyday experience. However
the first cortex we use for initial processing will be the system
we lead with and therefore our predominant style for integrating new
information in a manageable manner.
When we can identify our primary lead system, we can
enhance our natural coping style for dealing with pain in labor. Some
women suppress their natural style of coping because they have been
taught relaxation and breathing techniques which do not take into
account their unique manner of processing the labor experience.
Women have many different ways of dealing with pain
in labor. When left to uninhibited expression, a large percentage
will moan or make some use of sound during labor. These women use
an auditory means of expression for dealing with their pain. Other
women may squeeze a pillow or a friend's hand or even want to move
around as a way of meeting the contractions. These women are kinesthetic
in their coping style. Still others prefer to use internal or externalized
visual images for traveling through contractions. These women use
primarily a visual means of coping with pain.
Some methods of childbirth preparation inhibit vocalization
or movement because these expressions do not fit the concepts of what
relaxation is supposed to "look" or "sound" like. Methods which discourage
sound and squeezing in favor of relaxation which renders a woman quiet
and still, often inhibit the woman's natural and predominant coping
style. However because of the intensity of the labor experience most
women need to express and release through a contraction using auditory
or kinesthetic techniques in addition to visual methods.
The following exercises will help you to understand
and identify your own natural coping style, as well as increase your
ability to develop your other sensory pathways for dealing with pain
during contractions.
Lie down comfortably, perhaps on your side with a
pillow between your legs to accommodate the growing space between
your hips, now that you are very pregnant. This exercise is best to
do when you are approximately seven months pregnant. At this time
you are eager to prepare for birth, and learning comes quickly.
Arrange for your partner or a friend to pinch you
in the area of the fleshy part of your leg behind your knee. In this
way you will experience pain and will have to accommodate to it in
some way. Instruct your partner to gradually -- over the course of
60 seconds -- to build pain, until he or she is pinching you very
hard. The pinch simulates a contraction in that it causes you to do
something, either internally or externally, to adjust to it. If it
does not challenge you, then your partner is being too gentle. You
should feel a need to respond in some way to allow the pain to be
present and then pass.
Give yourself sixty seconds to rest and relax before
the next simulated contraction. Releasing between contractions is
a very important part of the exercise.
Partner's instructions: Pinch under the knee, building
from a gentle squeeze to a hard pinch in thirty seconds. Talk her
through the simulated contraction, telling her that you are about
to begin to squeeze before you do, then telling her when it is peaking
and when it is beginning to fade. When you reach the maximum pinch
at thirty seconds, hold it for approximately ten seconds, telling
her it is peaking, then gradually loosening your hold, diminishing
the squeeze, while telling her it is fading. The gradual fading should
take twenty seconds. You should observe your partner exerting some
effort to deal with the pain when it is peaking.
How did you respond to the pain? Did you hold your
breath? Did you breathe harder, listening to your breath and your
partner's voice? (auditory) Did you speak to yourself internally?
(auditory) Did you tighten your hands into a fist? (kinesthetic) Did
you use movement of any kind, such as hitting your hand on the couch?
(kinesthetic) Did you want a cold or a hot compress? (kinesthetic)
Did you use images to help you? perhaps nature scenes? (visual) Or
sounds such as rushing water? (auditory) or faces of those you love?
(visual)... If necessary, do the exercise again paying particular
attention to your responses. If you found that you instinctively held
your breath, do the exercise again, being certain to maintain your
breathing continuously while observing what other ways you respond.
You may have identified already whether you favor
an auditory, visual or kinesthetic response. The following exercises
will help you to clarify which modalities will work best for you in
labor. I encourage you to try all three, as well as combinations of
auditory-kinesthetic, and auditory-visual-kinesthetic to see what
works best for you.
NOTE: If there are any medical contraindications to
this exercise, such as varicose veins, consult your doctor regarding
a safe place to pinch.
Auditory Coping
The only negative way of coping is holding your breath.
Sometimes you won't notice you are doing so because it is instinctive
if you have been taught to hold in your feelings and not express yourself.
It is important to continue breathing through contractions. One way
for your partner to know for sure you are breathing is if he can hear
it.
Usually women stifle their breathing due to a conditioned
response to hide pain or because they do not want to cause others
distress. Remember this is your labor. Do what works for you and let
others take care of themselves. Work towards expression and release
if your tendency is to hold back. By doing so, you will be getting
ready for labor.
Do the simulated contraction exercise again, this
time purposely giving some sound to your breath. Hissing is good because
it engages the diaphragm, even though in labor you would use a moan
instead of hissing, because the internal pressure of the contraction
would be present. A low hum or hiss is best for this exercise.
When the pinch begins to peak, use the sound of your
breathing to carry you through it. Increase the hiss to a very loud
sound. Put all the pain into the sound of your breath, making it louder
the more pain you feel. Let the sound diminish as the pain ebbs away
and you don't need the sound to help you.
Kinesthetic Coping
Some women need to use movement or to meet the pain
by squeezing a pillow or even their partner's hand, if he is willing.
As long as you are breathing it is a useful technique for traveling
through contractions. However when women squeeze and hold their breath,
they are really squeezing inside instead of externally, tightening
the respiratory and other internal body pathways.
It is entirely possible to squeeze or tighten your
fist without tensing the internal organs as the voluntary and involuntary
nervous systems work in opposition most of the time. Therefore it
is not the case that if you are furrowing your brow, unfurrowing it
will be better for labor. In fact it is unrealistic for women to expect
they will totally relax all muscles during a contraction. Women who
cope kinesthetically usually need to express their pain physically.
By squeezing a pillow with your hand, you can express this tension
externally thereby lessening the likelihood of inner tension. As long
as you continue to breathe, your physical expression will help you
through the contraction.
Repeat the simulated contraction with your partner,
this time using the squeezing to express and release pain at the peak
of the contraction. You may also want to do both the auditory and
the kinesthetic together, particularly if you are inclined to hold
your breath.
Visual Coping
When using visual imagery for coping with contractions,
it is important that the image change or transform in some way to
match the changing intensity of the simulated contraction. If you
are using the image of a flower opening, say, you should visualize
the flower opening larger, or its color deepening, as the contraction
peaks. This allows the secondary visual cortex to accommodate the
increased sensation of the simulated contraction.
Repeat the simulated contraction exercise this time
using an internal image which changes as the contraction peaks. Be
sure you are simultaneously breathing through it as well.
None of these techniques will work if you hold your
breath. That is why it is often a good idea to incorporate an auditory
response of hearing your breath during contractions no matter what
other modalities you use or favor.
Try the exercise again. This time, listen to the sound
of your breathing, imagine your baby's head coming down as your cervix
opens, and hold tight to your partner's hand. This allows you to experience
all three coping strategies. Of these, which comes most naturally
to you? Which helps most with the pain? Can you use each of them or
all three together?
By doing the above exercises just one time thoroughly,
you have trained your body to adjust and adapt by using pain to help
you through labor. Your body will automatically respond to what worked
for you in these hands-on, body-centered exercises.
Remember that release in between contractions is where
you are headed as you travel through labor. During a contraction,
encourage yourself to meet the peak of the contraction with the active
coping strategies that work best for you. By encouraging yourself
to follow through the peak of the contraction with whatever coping
strategies you have identified in this chapter, you will find yourself
adjusting to your own inner tempo. Welcome the deep rest possible
in between contractions. It is within these valleys of deep release
that you can encourage yourself to completely rest, relax and replenish
yourself. Some women even report falling asleep in between contractions.
From: Chapter 7 of "An Easier Childbirth" by Gayle
Peterson, PhD Shadow and Light Publications
Copyright 1993 by Shadow and Light Publications. Reprinted with permission
from the author and publisher. This excerpt may not be reproduced
in any manner, including electronic, without prior written consent
from the publisher.
